As someone who has been pretty independent most of her life, learning to ask for help or seeking help has not been easy for me. I found that despite the many cancer resources and organizations out there, it is hard to know where to begin, what to search for, and what you might even need.

Have you ever had a life altering moment that reminds you how small our world is? Have you ever seen a total eclipse? If you haven’t, I highly recommend that you put it on your bucket list right now. My first experience was in 2017 when the path of totality went through Glendo, Wyoming. It is still the most magical thing I have ever witnessed — and as we headed on our 11 hour, normally 2 hour, journey back to Denver — we all excitedly discussed where we would go to watch the next total eclipse in April 2024 and termed ourselves “umbraphiles”.

As summer is dwindling, I am holding on to the simple pleasures of watering my garden and enjoying the last of the tomatoes. I know there are probably many reasons that contributed to my diagnosis — and I will never know for sure — but I do think that in recent years my disease may have been accelerated because I became more and more of an indoor creature.

I feel like the last two months have been the hardest and darkest days since this journey all began. After four months of infusions, every three weeks, my mind and body were completely depleted. It was hard for me to get myself up, to get outside, to get off the couch, let alone focus on a craft. I felt like a shell of myself — and honestly I probably was.

If you have gone through chemotherapy, how quickly did your hair start to fall out? Mine started falling out almost immediately. It was such a crazy experience, one that I felt like I would be prepared for, but I was not.

Sashiko is a Japanese hand-sewing technique to create geometric patterns. I learned that the name translates to mean “little stabs”. I started my first Sashiko kit after my reconstruction surgery and it was a lonelier time for me. I felt like I was on my own sooner and given I was a “survivor” at that point in time I did not feel like I had the same outpouring of support as I did during my mastectomy. I am positive a lot of this was by my own doing, reassuring everyone that I was stronger than I was. 

When I was in high school, I learned how to knit and I would knit through my freshman year of college. I remember always loving going to the yarn store to see all the colors and touching all the different skeins. Despite my fascination, I never moved past the basics of knitting a long rectangular scarf. Prior to my mastectomy, I went to a beautiful shop here in town known for their kits and beautiful curation of supplies. The owner helped me pick out a few kits she thought would be good to do while I was recovering. I spotted the Bennet Bandana and thought, I know how to knit, how hard could it be?

After my mastectomy, many of the crafts in my collection seemed daunting. As a recovering perfectionist, I worried about starting many of them because I didn’t want to mess them up in my drug induced fog and weak mobility. One of my friends, who is an artist and crafter herself, brought over dinner one evening and a low-stakes project that my sister and I could do together.

I’m currently fighting breast cancer and am an amateur craft enthusiast.

On November 3, 2022 I was diagnosed with DCIS or Stage 0 Breast Cancer in my left breast. After a couple months of deliberation, I decided to do a unilateral mastectomy and reconstruction. On February 3, 2023, I underwent my mastectomy.